Saying Hello and Goodbye

With Amanda having a break between leaving her old job and starting her new one, we figured it would be a great time for her to meet my family, specifically my grandmother. My grandmother isn't doing well and has little time left with us. Her Alzheimer's and dementia advanced drastically when she fell a few months ago and had to go under anesthesia. So we packed up my car and drove north to Minnesota.

I knew this trip was going to be hard for me. It was a goodbye trip; a final chance for me to see my grandma. I am who I am partly because of her. I would have never reconciled my relationship with God after my father died if it hadn't been for my grandmother. My grandma has always had a deep faith in God and always seen God's call with me.

On Friday, when Amanda and I were visiting my grandmother, I had moment where I realized our relationship had come full circle. When I was a child, I would hold my grandmother's hand for safety and comfort. On Friday, she held both my hand and Amanda's, for safety and comfort. As a child, my grandmother would help me great dressed; on Friday, we helped her. I will always cherish these moments because in them there was love. In my grandmother's love, even though she didn't realize it, she acknowledged me as the woman I have become. She also acknowledged the woman I have come to love, and whom I will get to marry. I am glad both of them got to meet each other, if only for a brief moment in time.

This trip wasn't only about saying "goodbye," it was also about saying "hello." During this trip, Amanda got to meet the rest of my family along with some friends. My grandfather has embraced her as his granddaughter and we all shared in great conversation. My sister embraced her as her future sister-in-law and aunt to their coming child. And my mom embraced her, sharing with Amanda a part of herself.

I know that the most likely time we will all be together again will be at my grandmother's funeral, I will be glad that we will get to bring these memories with us: my grandmother and her funny sayings, "Holy buckets, that's pit city," and my grandfather bringing out his cremation box during a board game, buying baby things for my sister and playing in the snow with her husband, Dustin, the lovely shower with so many relatives and friends, and time spent talking with my Mom and Mary. . . All these moments, I am grateful for, because all of these moments bring together my family of origin with my future wife and our future family.